Escape to Crusade
by Sarge11
Summary: A Long Time Ago in a Galaxy Far Far Away... The President has been captured. Oh my! He needs rescueing. And Ratchet is the only heroic Lombax on the entire force. Complete. Please review.
1. Chapter 1: The Plight of the President

**Escape to Crusade**

By Sarge 11

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Ratchet and Clank or any and all related media. But if I did, man, that would be da' bomb!

**I know, the title sucks. I was looking for insperation for a title and the first thing I saw was Stronghold: Crusader. Rated for a bit of cussing in later chapters. I filter a lot of stored anger ****into my stories.  
**

_**Chapter 1: The Plight of the President**_

A long year has passed since Ratchet and Clank defeated the twisted mastermind, Dr. Nefarious. However, there are still some Tyhrranoids left, organic and robotic alike, rallied to Neferious' cause. Ratchet, Clank, and the Galactic Rangers had just returned from fighting down a particularly nasty Thyrranoid rebellion on Marcadia. Now they have returned to the living quarters of the Phoenix.

"Hey Qwark, think fast!" said Ratchet as he lobbed a patented Gadgetron Slime Grenade (TM) at Captain Qwark.

Unexplainably, Qwark caught the grenade, and it exploded in his face, spraying him with slime and causing him to scream like a five-year-old girl. Everyone in the quarters erupted with laughter.

Realizing the the absence of a particular, feminine voice, Ratchet said silently to himself, _"Where's Sasha?_ _I'd better go find her."_

One of the galactic rangers within the room, model H-22,finally something after all the laughter died down "Hey Sarge, look at the galaxy's 'greatest' super heroe," he broached.

Ratchet stepped forward as if to leave the room, but H-26's metallic arm clasped him by the shoulder.

H-26 warned, "Can't see your girlfriend right now Sarge, she's busy." Ratchet turned a bright red that could be seen even through his fur. The Ranger struggled to stifle a chuckle._  
_

_'Ah well, might as well see what… who is that ,H-22?…whatever; was talking about'. _Ratchet turned and was glad he did cause' right then he got to catch a glimpse of the Captain crying with face in hands. Then Sasha walked in with a worried look on her face.

Ratchet walked up to her and gave her a small peck on her cheek, hoping to make her fell better, and thinking that the crew could handle it... they couldn't. A few seconds passed as the others tried not to laugh, but they couldn't hold it in. The living quarters was even louder than before. Now it was Ratchet's turn to be embarrassed as much as Qwark was, cause' everyone knew they were a little, O.K., way more than friends. Except Ratchet had someone to share the embarresment with.

_"Ah, well", Ratchet_ thought to himself. _"Love, after all, is a sensitive subject and is easy to laugh at."_

Sasha ordered everyone into the briefing room. There, she filled everyone in on the situation. "Alright, here's the deal. It seems"-...

_"Why is she struggling with this?"_, Ratchet wondered...

"-my father was Presidentknapped in that last revolt on Marcadia. His current whereabouts are not known but we have a strong lead on Florana, and seeing as the dense vegetation would obscure the surface from our satellites, it's the perfect place to hide a stolen president.. Ratchet and an attachment of Spec. Ops. Rangers will HALO drop into the Nabla Jungle under cover of darkness and retrieve the President. The code is B5429671-"

"Hey Clank, that's your serial number!" Ratchet interrupts Sasha.

"-Ahem, Ratchet…"

A chorus of "ooh, he's in trouble", went up all around the room in a concerted group of gasps.

Ratchet's eyes seemed to get smaller, he turned a bright red that could barely be seen under his thick fur, he sank ever so slightly into his chair, his ears curled down a bit, and he sheepishly looked down at his feet and quietly said, "O.K., I'm sorry. Continue."

"When we recieve the code, stealth transports will come down to pick you up. Got it?"

"Roger that!" said the gathered clutter of Rangers.

"Oh, one more word of advice. This is a complicated operation, and in my experience, when things get complicated, things go wrong. Watch yourselves out there. This may not seem like a complicated operation right now, however en route to the Nabla Jungle you will recieve the specifics of the mission. Move out." She said that last part real quietly and looked really specifically meaningfully at Ratchet.

Their eyes met. Her eyes displayed a clear message to Ratchet. To him, her eyes read, "Please be careful out there, I don't want to happen to you."

Sasha stood up and held her hands behind her back as she looks critically over the assembled group. "All right, time to move out. Go, go, go!"

**Props to Omnywrench for providing the layout for my story. And also, thank you Ganheim and Black Rosettes for giving me some tips. Please R&R!**

** -Sarge 11**


	2. Chapter 2: What's Happened!

**Escape to Crusade**

By Sarge 11

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Ratchet and Clank or blah, blah, blah.Why do I have to write this? It's not like anyone reads it.

_**Chapter 2: "What's Happened!"**_

Ratchet and his team of highly trained Spec. Ops. Rangers are en route to the Nabla Jungle in the Dropship where Sasha appeares over comlink to brief the team on the specifics of their mission.

"O.K., Ratchet! You and your team will drop in about a mile away from the target, where you will set up a small encampment. Seeing as Tyhrranoids cannot see infrared, you may only use infrared lights. When you reach the compound, we will use the stolen passwords recovered from one of the Robonoids, to open a weapons locker near the entrance full of weapons with silencers. Until that time you'll have to rely on Ratchet's skill with his Omniwrench 8000. Then, silently make your way through the west corridor. Keep going until you find the President's cell. Since we don't have codes to open the cell door, you're going to have to blast the lock. Once the President has been secured, proceed back to the encampment. Any quest-"Ssssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Where there was once Sasha's face was now only static. "What the fu-" was all Ratchet had time to say before a Tyhrranoid missile ripped through the hull of the Dropship.

The voice of a Ranger piped up from the cockpit. "Sarge, we're going dow-"Ppppppppppppsssssssssshhhhhhhhh! "Aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh!" Where there was once a Ranger pilot was a hole shaped like a missile.

"What the hell! How'd they know we were coming? Brace for impact!"

These Rangers didn't have to be told twice. Rangers rushed everywhere there was something to hold onto.

"Impact!"

Ppppppppppppssssssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Rangers and Ratchet alike were flung everywhere. The air was alive with the sound of screaming Rangers. Ratchet was panicking.

The last thing he remembered before going unconscious was flying headfirst at a large tree. The resounding crack of bone was as sickening as a Tyhrranoids' pits and, unfortunately for Ratchet, this happened to be a coconut tree. The impact of Ratchet's crash caused the coconuts to fall on him. The last thing he remembered was subconscious.

Subconsciously, he saw a group of Tyhrranoids walking over to him before he went unconcious.

Sasha's voice crackled through Ratchet's Helpdesk link. "Ratchet! Ratchet! What's happened!"

**Oh believe me, it gets way, way better. Please R&R. I know, I know. Ratchet? Panicking? It's so unreal!  
**

** -Sarge 11**


	3. Chapter 3: The Escape

**Escape to Crusade**

By Sarge 11

**Disclaimer: **I own squat. Insomniac owns Ratchet and Clank and all the glory (long live the Insomniacs!).

**_Chapter 3: The Escape_**

Ratchet woke up to find himself without Clank and in a dark, musty room. Apparently, the Tyhrranoids had captured him.

"Oh, my head. What just happened?" His question was answered just now in the most horrible way he could imagine.

"Hey, Secret Agent Clank!"

"Oh God, please not this guy!" Ratchet said under his breath.

"I think your chauffeur is conscious again!"

"Great, just my luck. Of all the cells to be thrown in, I get thrown in here with the President? Great. I've gotta get outta' here before they come to do what Tyhrranoids always do to they're, prisoners execute them. I've gotta get outta here. I didn't come all this way, fight so hard, and break half the bones in my body just to die at the hands of those God-forsaken Tyhrranoids. Ahem, I mean we've gotta get the **President** outta here. Oh, I have an idea. Clank, do you still have your shocker?"

"Yes, I believe that the Tyhrranoids know nothing about my shocker."

"Good, otherwise I'd use my wrench to break the lock, but they took it."

"Ratchet? Where are you going with this?" 

"Let's just say it's a crazy escape plan."

"Oh, I understand, you want me to zap the lock."

"Got it. Uh-oh, I hear footsteps. Better hurry up and charge it."

"I am charging as fast as I can, Ratchet."

"Well charge it faster!"

"That crash seems to have lowered my power level. It is currently halfway charged. Three fourths."

The last fourth seemed to take an eternity.

"It is fully charged."

"ZAP THE LOCK!"

Chhsshhooww!

"Clank, keep your Zapper equipped. Clank? Clank?"

"That last shock seemed to have overloaded my circuits. Until you get me recharged this will be the last you here of me."

Here, a robotic voice not Clank's says, "Core experiencing power loss. Main unit shutting down, have a nice day."

"Agent Clank!"

"Oh, would you shut up? Just follow my lead. It sounds like there are only two of them. I can rip one to shreds. We might survive this if you can break every bone in the other one's body. So I kill one and you kill one alright?"

The President gave him a blank stare.

"Alright, fine. You pampered executives can't fight worth a dime. I'll kill em' both."

As the Tyhrranoids approached, Ratchet jumped from the shadows, snarling like a wild animal. He was right about one, thing there were only two. However, he did make one very wrong calculation...these were Robonoids, not Tyhrranoids. As you can imagine, it's much harder for teeth and claws to penetrate solid carbonox than a wrench. The rumble went on for some time before a battered, bruised, bleeding , and pissed off Ratchet finally returned to the cell to retrieve the President.

"You coming or what? Grab Clank and let's get out of here!"

Luckily for them, they encountered no other resistance, other than a group of Floranian Blood Flies, which Ratchet tore apart.

They made it to the hanger eventually and picked a dropship to get out of there in and flew away.

**There, I finally got a reasonably long story in. Please R&R.**

**-Sarge 11**


	4. Chapter 4: How to Crashland

**Escape to Crusade**

By Sarge11

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing. Just the game. Ratchet and Clank are Insomniac's.

Thank you Illu and Mr. D 91 for reviewing.

_**Chapter 4: "How to Crash-land."**_

Ratchet, the now recharging Clank, and crying for no reason over Clank GP are flying through space in their commandeered Tyhrranoid dropship. Right now they're trying to rendezvous with the Phoenix in the Daxx system.

"Damn, what a piece a junk. Those Rangers don't know how lucky they are with their kind of Dropship." Ratchet muttered under his breath.

"Oh Agent Clank! Don't die on me! Don't leave me with this bumbling idiot of a chauffeur!"

"Oh, shut up! He's gonna be fine."

"How far to the rendezvous, **_Chauffeur?_**"

"Dammit, how many times do I have to tell you, I'm not Clank's chauffeur!"

"Watch your language in front of the President! You may be able to fool everyone else about your little faked, **_I've saved two galaxy's, one twice, _**but you can't fool me Jeeves! And you'd better stay away from Sasha, she's way too good for a mere chauffeur like yourself."

"Why you good for nothin' son of a-"

Ratchet was about to waste the President when.

"Ratchet?"

"Secret Agent Clank! You're alive!"

"Mr. President, Secret Agent Clank is merely a character I play on the holovid."

"Oh, I get it, you must be on a secret, undercover mission."

"Pppppp-whatever. If you need me, I'm gonna be tryin' to make sense out of this piece of shi-"

"Ahem, Ratchet."

"Uh, right. I mean junk."

"So, Agent Clank, what's the secret mission? Your secret's safe with me."

Clank's response was muffled by the sound of the engines.

Ppppppppppppppoooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwww! All of a sudden, one of the engines went out in a huge explosion that broke one of Ratchet's ribs.

"Oooooooowwwwwww!"

What Ratchet swore next is too obscene to be recorded for the rating I gave this story.

Clutching his left side, he made his way to the cockpit.

"What's going on?"

Ratchet kept from swearing because the GP was nearby.

"It seems we are under attack from Tyhrranosis' surface."

"I told you we shouldn't have flown over here!" Ratchet gestures to the President. "I told you we should've gone way around it! I told you the Tyhrranoids would be smart enough to read our ship to make sure we were Tyhrranoids! But no, you had to fly straight through to the Daxx system! Now look what's happened!"

Before the President could come up with a reply, Clank piped up. " We've lost the third engine, we have only enough power to make it to that small planet over there; and also have a missile on our tail."

The missile zoomed in closer.

"5,000 yards to planet and closing."

The missile was now just inches away from the back of the ship.

Kabloowie!

Ratchet's Helpdesk link piped up. "How to safely crash-land."

"Aw shad up!"

Ratchet was really irritated now.

"Going down!"

**Hey, Mr. D 91, how'd you know I was gonna crash the ship? >( Lol. Anyways, I need guidance, ah hey! My first three page long story! Anyway, please R&R.**

**-Sarge11**


	5. Chapter 5: The Mysterious Planet

**Escape to Crusade**

By Sarge11

**Disclaimer: **Once again, I own nothing. Except Crusade, my own original planet! Hahahahahahahaha!

**_Chapter 5: The Mysterious Planet_**

Ratchet, Clank, and the Galactic President were shot down over a strange planet while en route to the Daxx system. After they crash-landed on the strange, barren planet, they eventually left the reckage, found a path, and got to a fork in the road. After a rather loud and unpleasant argument over which path was easier and safer, Clank came up with the only way a situation like this could be resolved…

"Rock, paper, scissors!" said both the GP and Ratchet.

The GP shouted triumphantly, "Ha! Rock smashes scissors! We go left!"

"Uh, best two out of three?" said Ratchet nervously.

"Ha ha ha! I don't think so, Jeeves!"

"Whatever, just shut up and let's get moving." Oh yeah, now Ratchet's ticked. "Hey Clank, what planet are we on anyway?"

The little robot's antenna projected a holographic image of the system they were in. "Hmmm. My star map indicates we are on a fairly uninhabited planet called Crusade. It was called Crusade because the few tribal inhabitants that live here are very nearly trying to conquer each other's lands in massive invasions."

Ratchet looked extremely disappointed. "So there's no way to contact the Phoenix?"

Clank looked as strangely as a robot could at Ratchet and asked, "You you've given up already? Ratchet, this is not like you."

Ratchet sighed, "I know it's just that I'm not sure we should trust our lives with a rock, a piece of paper, and a pair of scissors."

"Nonsense. I have known this technique to work in a great many situations," Said the stubborn little robot.

The President suddenly spoke up, "Hey! You know, I'm here too!"

Now, Ratchet looked extremely irritated, "Yes, we know. It's just that you've never really helped us with anything."

Clank suddenly said, "There are several bipedal creatures approaching from the south."

"It's probably one of those tribesmen you were talking about earlier. Clank, get your shocker charged."

At this point, Clank opened up his compartment in his midsection and pulled out Ratchet's wrench.

Ratchet was dumbfounded. "How did you get that back? I thought the 'noids

took it."

The little robot looked as smug as a robot could. "No, they did not. Before they took us prisoner, I hid your wrench in my compartment."

Ratchet held his wrench, once again. But to him, it was not merely a hard tool, but a useful hard tool that was like an extension of his arm.

However, while Ratchet was daydreaming about the good times he had had his wrench, a shadow that no one had noticed jumped from its hiding spot behind a small desert shrub.

The President screamed, but Ratchet was fast enough that he could turn around and smash his opponents stomach in.

Battle cries went up from all the other shrubs in the area.

"Oh shit," Ratchet cursed.

Ratchet and Clank fought gallantly, fighting off over half of their assailants. However, right when it looked like they were going to win, a shadow crept up behind Ratchet.

Ratchet turned around and was able to say one last thing before going unconscious, "Ah crap, not again."

**Bwahahahahaha! Fear the mighty cliffy! It is the end. Lol. Why aren't you laughing? I command you to laugh! There, that's better. Please R&R!**

**-Sarge11**


	6. Chapter 6: Roast Lombax and Cazar

**Escape to Crusade**

By Sarge11

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing, just my planet.

**Chapter 6: Roast Lombax and Cazar**

The trio, whose names I'm getting tired of repeating, have crash-landed on the planet Crusade. They have been captured **again **and are being carried to some distant forest.

Ratchet woke up to find himself hanging upside down with his hands and feet tied to a long stick. "Whoa, what happened?"

"Ratchet, you are conscious again." Clank was sitting in a chair carried by a group of tribesmen, looking rather cozy.

"What the hell are you doing up there?" Ratchet asked.

By now they were up in the trees.

The little robot narrowed his eyes a little and looked a little smug. "After you went unconscious, they found me and started bowing and chanting something at me. Apparently they believe me to be some sort of a god."

Ratchet's eyes nearly popped out of his head. "You, a god!" Ratchet burst out laughing, only to receive a sharp poke in the ribs from one of the tribesmen's spears. Ratchet yelped in pain. "Damn, in all the confusion I forgot my rib was broken. Curse you painful reminder!"

By now they had reached the central courtyard of some kind of tree village and hung over some black stones.

Ratchet looked a little worried now. "Hey Clank, what are they doing?"

Clank himself looked like he was about to laugh. "It seems you are going to be the main coarse in a great feast to honor me."

"What!"

The creatures brought out the wood.

All of a sudden, Ratchet had an idea. "Clank, tell them if you do not release us, then you will become angry, and call upon your mighty wrath from the heavens."

Clank spoke up, "But I have no such wrath, how could I possibly-"

"Just do it."

Clank babbled on in some strange tongue.

It didn't work.

"Don't worry Clank, I knew it wouldn't work. Pull out the Tempest and start zapping away until they agree to cut us down."

The wood was down, here came the fire.

Cccccccccssssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Where there was once a tribesman was now a smoldering pile of ash. All eyes were once again on Clank, who was charging up another shot.

Cccccccccssssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Tribespeople were running every which way, two of which cut down Ratchet and the President. For revenge, Ratchet whacked a few with his wrench.

"Finally!"

"Oh Agent Clank, you're my hero!"

Clank laughed his signature laugh and looked at the front and back of his hand. "Nothing to it."

**Sorry it's so short. I know crummy ending. Can you say Ewoks?**

**-Sarge11**


	7. Chapter 7: Some Old Friends

**Escape to Crusade**

By Sarge11

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing, zip, nada, and zero.

**Finally ! The next two chapters are up!  
**

_**Chapter 7: Some Old Friends**_

It was Ratchet who decided that building a ship was too difficult in the conditions they were in. So they decided to build a radio. The only problem was, they didn't have the materials. So they needed to find them. Also, for some reason, the President followed.

"Clank, we've been searching for hours." Ratchet whined. "Could we just sit down for FIVE MINUITES!"

Clank responded in his flat robotic voice, "I don't see why not. My servos are clogging and I need to be still for them to become clean."

The Lombax sniffed around. "I smell something, but it doesn't smell like metal." He sniffed again and pulled out his Omniwrench. "It smells organic."

A beeping sound came from Clank. "Your guess is accurate. I detect an organic life form approaching from the southeast."

A scratchy voice came out from the bushes. "There is no need to draw your weapon child, for violence is not the answer and I am no threat."

"Hey, it's the mystic hippy guy!" Ratchet cried out.

"Your eagerness to see me is comforting child." Said the mystic.

"Well, don't get used to it, I just need one of your gadgets." Ratchet said.

The mystic replied in his all too calm voice, "Ah, yes. I happen to know that you are looking for parts for a transmitter. Fortunately for you, I happen to be looking for something on this barren, empty planet you would call a wasteland, and would be willing to throw upon you information on the whereabouts of such things. Bring me 10 Sapphires and this information shall be yours."

That messed up GP stood up and said, "Who are you to make us barter for our lives?"

"Don't listen to him, he's an idiot," Ratchet taunted.

The hippy spoke up, "No, he is not."

Ratchet was practically speechless. "What? Of coarse he is!"

"He is not. In their own special way, everyone is an idiot," the mystic replied.

Ratchet slapped his forehead and shook his head. "Now he's a philosiphiser. Well, we don't have any better ideas, let's go grab a few Sapphires."

"I believe I saw one near an altar at the village," Clank said. "Let's start there."

Slowly, all three crept up on the village where they had stayed.

"O.K., I'll go in and create a distraction, you guys go in and get it out," Ratchet planned.

"Got it," The other two said.

All of a sudden, Ratchet jumped up, "Booga booga booga!" and scared heck out of the villagers.

While they were busy running away, the GP actually proved he was worth the trouble, by jumping out and crushing the two guards that had stayed behind, and grabbing the Sapphire. "I got it!" He shouted.

Ratchet came running back. "Good, only nine more to go." He looked at Sasha's father with a new respect.

The President, Ratchet, and Clank walked up to the mystic and handed him three bags of sapphires.

"Ah yes, you have bought your information. You are looking for a crashed Galactic Ranger Dropship. Just go North. I found it myself and met three gentlemen who had crashed on this planet."

They came into view of an old model Dropship.

"Well, this is the place. Now where are they."

Two eyes popped up out of a small slit in a wall. "Well, if it isn't my two best customers."

"Slim Cognito! What are you doing here?"

"I had another run in with the cops concerning those guns I sold you. Apparently, you really liked them. I needed another place to do business. I got a random call from this person and decided to set up shop."

Someone else walked into the room. "Hey hey hey, I know you two!"

"Look, the plumber's back!" Ratchet jeered. "So, what are you doing here?"

"See, it's pretty much the same as this guy," the plumber motioned at Slim, "except I got a call and came here for maintenance. We've been stuck on this goldarn planet for six months."

No one saw the shadow appear in the doorway.

**New ending! Sorry these took so long; I got grounded. R&R!**

**-Sarge11**


	8. Chapter 8: Sarge

**Escape to Crusade**

By Sarge11

**Disclaimer: **I, Sarge11, do not own Ratchet and Clank. I do own my planet and myself! Go me!

**_Chapter 8: Sarge_**

Ratchet and Clank have been searching for parts and found nothing. However, after they were done moping around, someone new emerged that would really help them; a human about 21 years old. He wore a tattered, old military uniform.

Ratchet's ears perked up as someone new entered the area. "Hey, who are you?"

The stranger replied, "Sergeant, uh well, everyone just calls me Sarge. Sergeant of the 11th Army's Armored Ranger Battalion. You know the tank guys? With my command group everyone just calls me Sarge11."

Ratchet looked a little lost so Clank cut in, "Ratchet, that's your old unit."

"Hey it is. How'd you wind up on this pathetic excuse for a planet?" Ratchet questioned.

Sarge replied, "Well, I was just 20 at the time. I remember, we were one of the units chosen to fight on Veldin against the Tyhrranoids. My tank transport was a little late; I had to hurry, because if my unit were any later, I would have been demoted down to Private. So we took a shortcut over Tyhrranosis. Well, what happened next was pretty hard to remember; I myself was unconscious after the first wave of missiles. Anyway, we crashed on this planet so, here I am. I'm the only one that survived long enough to find the Dropship again. So, there's my story, how about yours. Oh and, what's your name?"

"So that's what happened to the last Sergeant! The name's Ratchet, and this is my buddy, Clank." Ratchet told his story, starting with Drek, moving on to that Protopet incident, as it was called in those days, and finally, onto Nefarious.

After he heard that he was the one who defeated Nefarious, Sarge's eyes got real big. "You defeated Dr. Nefarious? Wow! So what are you, a General?"

Ratchet looked at him funny. "No, you don't have to have a high rank to be a hero. In fact, I'm just a Sergeant."

At this, Sarge's eyes nearly popped out of his head, and his jaw practically fell down on his feet. "Get out! There is no way that a Sergeant could have clearance like that!"

Now it was Ratchet's turn to be smug. "Yeah, unless your girlfriend was the Captain of the Phoenix, and you saved two other galaxy's!"

Now the Private's jaw fell through the floor. "What! You have got to be shitting me! You're going out with Sasha? Lucky!"

Ratchet chuckled a little.

Sarge slapped Ratchet on the back of his head. "Hey, I've never seen a Cazar and a Lombax mix, let me know what they look like."

"My Sasha and that Chauffer, Jeeves mix? Unheard of!" The President came out of nowhere.

"Oh no. I thought you were asleep."

Sarge looked a little confused. "Hey who's that tub a'- oh my gosh! He-he-he-he-hello Mr. President. Imagine seeing you here."

Now the GP looked really angry. "What are you doing here? I thought I banished you after that affair you had with Sasha!"

Sarge looked extremely nervous. "Um what affair? I don't know what you're talking about."

This just made the President more furious. "Don't play dumb with me soldier! I know all about what happened between you and Sasha!"

Sarge panicked. "It's not my fault! The Galactic Rangers had just heard of Drek's defeat and were having a party at a local bar on planet Batalia! She was drunk and was moving in on me!"

After hearing this, Ratchet raised an eyebrow and his ears perked up. "What's he talking about?" Then it hit him. He gave Sarge a mischievous smile.

After the President had left for the bathroom, Ratchet turned to the Sarge and said, "Luckier!"

Sarge gave him a nervous grin. "Heh. Hey, what's with this chauffer stuff anyway?"

Ratchet explained to him the whole Secret Agent Clank thing.

Realization crept into Sarge's face. "Oh. I guess I never had time to watch the tube in the army."

Ratchet's eyes were once again full of fire. "All right. We've finally got enough people with sense. We have been having trouble finding the right materials for a beacon. Maybe you can help."

Sarge also looked eager. "All right, let's get to it."

**I know, I'm a nasty little Lombax. I need ideas for the next chapter, PLEASE! Don't you just hate them cliffies? Reread the entire story now and tell me what you think. I need some more reviews! **

**NOTE: Sarge11 :) is now a Private.  
**

**-Sarge 11**


	9. Chapter 9: Them

**Escape to Crusade**

By Sarge11

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing except Crusade, the creatures, and myself.

_**Chapter 9: Them**_

Ratchet, Clank, the GP, and Sarge11 are looking for parts for a transmitter. Slim and the Plumber stayed behind to "guard" the ship.

"Hey, Ratchet, you have a Helpdesk wrist link right?" Sarge11 asked.

"Yeah, where's this going?" the Lombax replied.

"Doesn't it have a voice box?" the Private questioned.

Realization flooded into Ratchet. "Uh-hu."

"Bingo, we have our first part," said Sarge11 in a victorious tone.

Ratchet asked, "Why did Slim and our Plumber friend stay behind? They looked scared."

Sarge11 froze apparently with fear. "Move one muscle, and you're gonna find out."

Slowly, Ratchet turned his head in the direction Sarge11 was looking in. And relaxed, he couldn't see anything.

The Lombax shrugged his shoulders. "What? I don't see anything."

Sarge11 was trembling now; and sweating like a steam machine. "Look… harder… Ratchet. They can change the color of their skin to blend in with their environment," he said in a whispered tone.

And then Ratchet saw it; a figure crouched in the bog he was standing next to, just watching him, like a lion watches a gazelle from the rocks.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: If you've seen Signs, you'll know what it looks like. Well, you can at least see the silhouette.

Sarge11's throat went dry. "It's one of **Them**, we need to find shelter before it gets completely dark when they really start to come out.

But of coarse, Ratchet is Ratchet, and seeing as he's Ratchet, he charged the creature. "Eat wrench you tall son of a bitch!"

And of coarse the ever-idiotic President couldn't help piping up, "Hey! What did I tell you about swearing in front of the Galactic President?"

"Screw it! We're in the wilderness now!" Ratchet yelled back.

"Ratchet! Shut up! Do you want the entire pack to know you're here?" Sarge11 asked and yelled.

"How many can there be?" He replied back.

His question was answered as about fifty more emerged from the muck.

Ratchet stood there, dumbfounded. "Holy shit!"

And then… they pounced!

**There's nothing much to say except please R&R!**

**-Sarge11**


	10. Chapter 10: The Final Escape

**Escape to Crusade**

By Sarge11

**Disclaimer:** Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.

Chapter 10: The Final Escape 

Ratchet, Clank, Sarge11, and the GP were captured once again. And as in every situation where someone is captured, they need a better escape plan, than the plan in which they were captured.

"Well we could try to dig our way out of here with spoons." Ratchet woke up to find himself in the presence of Skidd McMarx. He was talking to the person in the cell next to him.

"No. That's how I escaped last time. They already wised up to my best escape plan."

Ratchet's eyes jumped open at the sound of Sarge11's voice and this new information. "Hey! You've been here before? When? And why is Skidd here?" Everyone stared at Ratchet.

Everyone turned their heads to Sarge11.

Clank spoke up. "Yes, you only brought up the fact that you were here before just recently. How did you get here?

"I, uh, got captured. The rest of my crew didn't die in the field, they died at the hands of these guys in the cells."

Ratchet now noticed the charred bones all around the area. He shuddered. "So what did those things do?"

Sarge11 took a deep breath like he was gonna say something before he was interrupted by one of the creatures. Sarge11 was almost frozen in fear, the creature headed over to Skidd who was asleep. It shook him until he was awake.

"Watch this," Sarge11 said.

Skidd, now awake, said, "Hey man, chill out."

The others watched in horror as two holes opened up in the creature's cheeks and tentacles came out of them. They slowly made their way toward Skidd's nostrils. They made it inside his nostrils and went up into his skull and where his brain was supposed to be… Skidd giggled and said, "That tickles. But the tentacles came out empty.

Sarge11 had a funny look on his face. "But, it was supposed to suck his brain out."

Ratchet gave it some deep thought. Then it hit him. "Oomph. Hey! That thing just pounded my stomach!"

Sarge11 said, "Well, the author did just say it hit you."

"Oh. Anyway, I know why Skidd's brain didn't come out with the tentacles. He has no brain!" All of a sudden, he had another idea. "Everyone act like Skidd!"

Almost instantly, everyone fell asleep.

_(Five hours later)_

Ratchet was the last to wake up and… He still had his brain! And, even better, the creatures had left the door open.

Clank saw he was awake and handed him the Tempest. "You may need this for our escape."

…

"We win!" Ratchet shouted triumphantly.

"I never thought I'd see the day when we would wipe out that tribe." Sarge11 said, tears of joy coming to his eyes.

Now Skidd said, "I'd better get back to my ship. Sasha and the Q-Force will be wanting to here my report on your position."

"Wait, did you just say you have a working ship?"

Skidd gave them a look he reserves for people he thinks he's smarter than. "Duh!"

Everyone looked at each other, then at Skidd and said in unison, "Take us with you!"

(On Skidd's ship)

"I never thought I'd get out of that hellhole." Sarge11 said.

"I'm just glad to be alive." Ratchet said with relief.

(Cue music at the end of Jurassic Park.)

**Well what did you think? It's finally finished. There's one last chapter that I think you'll like. **

**-Sarge11**


	11. Credits

**Escape to Crusade**

**Credits**

Writer/Author…Sarge11 (Chris Whitfield)

Idea…English Teacher (Hillary Jackson)

Support…Mom and Dad (Dan and Tammy)

Actors…Ratchet, Clank, Galactic President, Tribespeople, Plumber, Slim Cognito, Galactic Rangers, Sarge, Tyhrranoids, Robonoids, Captain Qwark

Special Thanks…Lady Illu, Mr. D 91, Black Rosettes, Ganheim, Sandy87, Leila, all the readers who didn't review after reading my sorry story, all the patient spouses, parents, boyfriends, girlfriends, pets, and friends for your support, and of coarse Insomniac Games for creating the greatest gaming franchise in all gaming history

I would I also like to extend a special thanks to…Omnywrench, for providing the layout for my story

**God bless us, everyone. I need ideas for a new story people. Every suggestion will be taken and studied with the same thoroughness as I play Ratchet and Clank with.**

**-Sarge11**


End file.
